Intersections

I remember a Saturday night when I was in high school. I was cleaning the bathrooms of my parents' house without thinking much of it. My dad came upstairs as I was cleaning the upstairs bathroom and asked me what I was doing, and why I didn't have something better to do on a Saturday night. He was frustrated for me. At that moment, I felt happy about the task, but felt his frustration was a huge vote of confidence in my favor. Contrary to popular belief, most of my Saturdays in high school were lonely ones.

Tonight I broke off any other engagements (which were minimal, at best) to go to the Tiki and play. I brought my horn. Unfortunately, none of the musicians I knew showed up. This was the first time ( out of 7) I have been there and not seen the same cast of characters. So no performance. I did play at home beforehand, and a new reed has greatly enhanced my tone. But I was denied. So I shrugged off into the night. On a good note, I did meet a jazz history major (former military, can't make that up) and I was able to promote Pete Robbins, so that is awesome.

Tonight, Sunday night, was my Saturday. I work again on Tuesday. I am nowhere here. I have friends. I have contacts. I have a job. None of this is sufficient, but I will say that I am developing some quality friends, thanks to this shitty job. But yeah, it's a lonely existence. I got shutout. But I played a bit tonight and felt great. I'll get the chance to get up there and kill. As it turns out, I met some musicians tonight that might be another avenue for me. I'm not out here to be a musician, but at this point I want performance to always be a part of my life. So I'll take it and look for a better day tomorrow.

I had deja vu earlier today. I always trace deja vu to previous dreams. Therefore, I know I am on my path.

Hope everyone is sleeping well out there. Perhaps dreaming of Adrian Gonzalez.